My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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