i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
tell your sister to shave her snatch
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
