"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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