I wish my penis had an off switch
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
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It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
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It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
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