Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize