Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
