Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
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