now i know why i became what i already was.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Randomize