I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
