if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Randomize
