Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Randomize
