Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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