Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
