So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
being pregnant is like rehab
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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