um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
