problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
