Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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