I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
