My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
we're so committed to being not committed
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..