I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
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