well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
