I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
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