Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
