Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
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