Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
How external is "for external use only"?
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
