I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize
