Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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