I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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