sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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