omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
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