our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Randomize
