Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize