So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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