YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
