i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
my poor anus
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
