You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize