I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
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