I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Randomize
