When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found the puke drawer
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
Randomize