I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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