dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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