plz talk dirty to me
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Randomize
