:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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