i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
The chlamydia really affected his face.
whose ass print is on the piano?
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
