But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
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