fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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