I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Randomize
