i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Randomize
