I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
