? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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