I must be too annoying 4 u.
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
I have tasted many bathrooms
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Randomize